21.4.2024

 Dear diary,

Yesterday I got news that my cousin is pregnant with her 3rd child. 

I’m feeling happy for her but deep down I question myself

‘When will be my turn?’ 😔

Before I slept last night, my tears stream down my cheeks

O Allah,

Forgive all my husband and I, we’re a sinner

Forgive me if I ever doubt and questions your plans for me as I know You’re the All Knowing

Forgive me for being ungrateful for everything You have bestow upon me

Forgive me if I’ve asked for more than I deserved 😞

Bless me with patient and make me a better muslim

3.4.2024

Dear Diary,

Today marks 23 Ramadan 1445H, Raya is approaching, exactly one week to go! Yuhuuu

Today we packed some instant foods for front liners who have to work during 1st day of Syawal. But heyy I also work on the first day of Syawal, why I didnt get one meh? Haha

All the preparation of raya is already settled. Alhamdulillah. This year with opt for purple. Next year I want to make the decision, all this while it's always my mum and my sis got to decide 😕 And I already have the color in mind, mint greennn! Haha 

Ramadan this year is too dull for me, I only perform tarawikh once, I feel so ungrateful but the satan in me is more powerful hoho. Forgive me my Lord. I'll try my best to perform my 2nd tarawikh tonight and untill the last day of Ramadan, InshaAllah. 

You want Allah to grant your prayers but you dont have the effort to worship Him. Silly!